This morning was a tough one. I asked my 5-year-old what he wanted for breakfast and I made it for him exactly as he ordered. When I served it he said I made it wrong and he didn’t want it. He crumbled it up and dumped his breakfast on the table and started yelling and crying. I stood my ground and told him I wasn’t making him anything else and if he continued yelling and crying he had to leave the kitchen so his brother could have a quiet breakfast.
The morning just got worse and worse. I need a nanny, I thought. My son is so good for other people, but he constantly challenges me. Instead, I remembered the item that I’m giving away for Giveaway Monday is exactly what I needed this morning.
Kimberley Clayton Blaine is the Go-To Mom and her new book is “Parents’ Guide to Emotion Coaching Young Children.” She is a licensed child and family therapist and I stopped reading parenting books about the time I stopped nursing. I looked in the section about “Dealing with Tantrum”s and found the advice I needed for the situation, “Ignore It.” This can only be done at home, the book says, and we were at home. Instead of picking him up and taking him to Dad in the other room, like I did, I should have ignored his tantrum. I just became more frustrated when he came back into the kitchen and kept complaining about how his breakfast wasn’t the right temperature.
My child is very strong willed. I know this because he is me. Arguing back at him wasn’t the right solution, but it’s hard to remember parenting strategy at 6:30 am. The book goes on to say that “the more you try to control your child, the more resistant he’ll be.” And that’s exactly what happened.
The next time he throws a fit about food (most likely, tomorrow) I’m going to remain calm, ignore it, and wait until he’s ready to eat. It’s worked in the past.
If you live in the United States and would like to win a copy of Kimberley’s book, please leave a comment below (with your contact information) about why her book would help your family. I’ll announce a winner on Friday.
And be sure to check out The Go-To Mom’s new online series, MommyToMommy.TV.
Here is a little info about the series:
“Twice per month, Blaine (who produces and hosts the show) will team up with a different momblogger, mompreneur or celebrity guest to deliver info-tainment on the featured topic. With its fast-paced talk show style, the show is designed to entertain and inform moms about the things they care about most. The show will feature a variety of hot topics about motherhood, family, and the work/life balance so many moms juggle. Everything from how-to’s for throwing a killer birthday party for your kids, to juggling entrepreneurship and motherhood, or dealing with relationships, fertility issues, and body image—no topic will be left uncovered.”